Podunk.

This has been an emotional week. I'm not even sure why.

Thursday I had an Observation for Teaching Techniques. The class we were observing is in Noble, this little podunk town outside of Norman. It's literally about four streets by four streets wide. This is key to find the irony in this story.

So I got a ride with my friend Andy, Julia, and P.J. so that I wouldn't feel the pressure of driving. I hate driving to places I don't know. So we all cram into Andy's little mustang hotrod (he strikes me as more of a big red, hick truck kind of guy) and drive to Noble. The class starts at 10:45 am. We leave about 10:30, which should be enough time to get to Noble Middle School. However, nobody looked up directions on how to get there because we all assumed somebody else would (you know what they say about when you assume...). But luckily, Julia had her iPhone and mapquested it. So we're driving along, all hunky dory, and we're following the directions perfectly, and it brings us to Pioneer Intermediate/Elementary School. Not the right place. So then we drive a little farther down the street (and by a little further I literally mean one block) and see this other school looking building. We also see some of our friends from class walking out of the building. They say it's an administration building, and they got directions. So we follow them. Those directions took us to Noble High School. Not the right place. So then some of our OTHER friends from class call Andy asking if we had found it yet. Nope. But those other friends had gotten directions from this lady on the street, so we followed their directions. It took us to an elementary school. Not the right place. But we saw this other school a little up the street so we went there. ANOTHER elementary school. Not the right place! Finally we just decide to drive around to the ONLY place we hadn't driven, and guess what? We found the middle school. We walk into the classroom forty-five minutes late, sit down, and about two minutes later, the class is dismissed. We spent forty-five minutes driving no father than three streets horizontally and about six streets vertically looking for this dumb middle school. What a story!

Last night, Jon, Ethan, Kaylie and I went to see 2012. I felt like the movie was drawn on too long, and too unrealistic. The main character, Jackson, makes all these close escapes without even a scratch! I was over the movie when he fell into the pit created by an earthquake/volcanoe, and climbed out totally unscathed. Anyways, ironically, today there are tsunami threats in Hawaii, Alaska, and California. Freaky.

And today I went job hunting. NOBODY is hiring right now. But I guess I'll still apply.
Oh and, I had made plans to go to some free swing dance lessons with Jon, except Jon didn't know about it. I just told him not to plan anything after 5:30. I called him and he was working on a lab with his lab group and said he'd have to stay late. The lessons started at 6, and I still haven't heard from him. I'm really upset. So I think I'll go practice bassoon and piano now to relieve my emotions.
I was really looking forward to this.

Woohoo!

So I had three tests (back to back to back) last Wednesday morning. I got a 92 on my first one (Theory), a 93 on my second one (Spanish), and I'm pretty sure I aced the last one (Music in Culture). Hopefully I get the last one back Wednesday.

Well, I think I aced it. I know I aced the test portion (it was all just memorizing and regurgitating the facts back. I finished in ten minutes. And that's including double checking my work, and waiting for my teacher to play the song excerpts a second time.) but the essay portion I'm pretty SURE I did okay. But the GA is grading them. And she seems like a ... you know what. Haha. So we'll see what happens.

I have three (possible four) quizzes tomorrow. A keyboard quiz, where we have to play a I IV I V I chord progression (in different inversions in the right hand) and any key she gives us. Easy Peasy Lemon Squeezey. Then I possibly have a singing quiz in that same class. I don't know, because we each have to sing one at a time, and she only does two people a day. So, yeah. It sucks. Then I have a spanish vocab quiz. I know about half of the words. I'll probably make flash cards after this. And then I have a "patterns quiz." The teacher will sing TWO notes (not even kidding! two!) and we have to sing them back. Man I love being a music major! Hahah

I wish I wrote deeper, more philosophical blogs. But I can't.

Maybe one of these days I'll write a blog in spanish! That would be fun! I attempted to write a letter to Jon in spanish once. I gave up after "Dear Jon. Right now I'm in my room and I'm very bored. Right now you are at (wherever he was.. I don't remember). I love you. I don't know what to say" or something like that. Then I reverted back to my natural language.

I really love spanish though. If I wasn't trying to graduate early, I would maybe consider minoring in it. It's just so interesting!

Weekend.

This has been a really nice weekend!

Friday evening, Jon went to stay with his aunt in Moore with his mom, so I thought I was going to be really lonely. But Amy and I went to go see Princess and the Frog. DON'T spend money on it. It was weird. And then after that we got dinner. And then I went to bed. Nice, and relaxing Friday night.

Saturday was really chill, too. I slept in, watched Pocahontas and other Disney shows. And then Jon's mom and I went out for a coffee date/Walmart run while Jon was at the men's basketball game. It was a lot of fun! We bought Jon a new fish since his last one died. He doesn't have good luck with fish. And then the three of us went to PadThai after Jon got out. It was really good! And then after that Jon's mom left and Ethan came over and we WERE going to watch The Office, but I guess they didn't show a new one last Thursday? Bummer. So we watched some SNL skits, YouTube videos, and 16 & Pregnant. :) I've got Jon hooked on the show, too!

And today I slept in, got some Burger King, and now Amy and I are watchign The Hangover. Not my choice, but she thinks it's hilarious. I might take a nap.

This is a weekend I've needed.

Trust.

Trust is a funny thing.
Once it's broken, it's so hard to gain it back.

Why can't everything just stay the same.

Stress.

This has been a stressful week.

Early!

This weekend was a blast! Zachary came up with my Mom and Jenny & Tyler played an AWESOME concert and Amy's boyfriend Taylor came up! And Valentine's Day was GREAT. Jon sure does know how to be romantic! And I'll explain more about all of this later (probably after Wednesday - I have THREE tests Wednesday morning! One at 8:30, one at 9:30, one at 10:30. SUCKS!) but I just wanted to keep the three people who read this updated with my current decisions and whatnot.

Friday afternoon I had a meeting with the temporary head of the Music Education department (the normal guy is on sebbatacle) and talked about the possibility of graduating early. By early, I mean one semester early. Which will mean I'll be graduating in four years instead of four and a half. So technically, I'm graduating on time. But for music majors, it's WAY early! Graduating early is pretty much unheard of! But I'm going to do it! I'll have to take two summers of summer school, and that's basically it! I mean, I'll have to take the classes that are originally in my Senior Spring Semester in my Junior Spring Semester, but since I came into college with so many Gen Ed's, that's a piece of cake. AND I'll never have to take more than 18 hours a semester! I HAVE to take extra classes in order to be a full time student my senior year and keep my scholarships. So if I wanted to, I could just take 14-16 hours each semester, and I won't have to find some random just-for-fun class my senior year. But I might want to do that anyways. ;)

So that's my new goal.
I WILL be graduated in May of 2013, not December.
I WILL be one of the few Music Ed majors to graduate EARLY/ON TIME!

I am so excited about this!

Oh, and I also have a friend who is like me (came in with a lot of credits) and we're going to do all of this together! We'll be each other's support!

Did I mention how excited I was?

Mini-Rant

I feel like I've posted a lot today.

I guess I'm just in the blogging mood because I have to keep up with a blog for my Teaching Techniques class. I have to blog about twice a week. And since I haven't done that AT ALL this semester, I need to write about eight blogs by Friday. I've already written two so far. Only at least six to go!

Anyways, I was taking an online survey and it was asking me things for just statistics (i.e. What is your age? What is your ethnicity? What country do you live in?) and one of the questions asked "What is your profession?" and it's multiple choice. I obviously put "Full-time Student," but there was an option that said "Full-time Parent, Homemaker."

That really pushed my buttons. You are not a "full-time parent" only if you're a stay-at-home mom. EVERY parent is a "full-time parent." Parents who work aren't "part-time parents!" If you have a child, you are his/her mother/father ALL THE TIME.

Ugh.

Mini-rant over.

Random

I know I already posted today, but I just feel like posting again.

I just want to let everyone know that nothing weird is going on. I just have a lot on my plate right now. Some things didn't turn out the way I would have imagined, but I guess that's the way life works.

Friday night was the Engineering Ball. It was weird and a little awkward. It was very small, and there was a bar. But I got my dancing shoes on (and by that I mean I took off the shoes I was wearing so I could dance) and boogied. But then Jon and the couple we were with wanted to leave to go to this party at his house (the guy in the couple). So we went. There was drinking. I was uncomfortable. That's probably the first REAL party I went to where the main goal of it was to get drunk. But we all went upstairs and played video games. Haha. I'm obsessed! It's called Feeding Frenzy. You're a fish and you eat smaller fish and avoid the bigger fish that will eat you. And once you eat enough smaller fish, you turn into a bigger fish! It's awesome. And very educational. So I guess something good came out of this party? Haha

Sunday was the Super Bowl (I never know if this is supposed to be one word or two? I guess two?). See earlier post.

Yesterday I had SO much homework to do. I was very stressed out.

Today is my best day of the week. It's the least busy class-wise. So in about an hour I'll do my fish Middle School Tutoring session! I'm excited. Amy and I both do it, so she'll show me the ropes. And after that I'm going to Zumba. And then my tons of homework that I'm putting off.

Right now I'm using the Crest WhiteStrips that whiten your teeth. It's the first time I've used them. I haven't decided if I like them yet. I don't really enjoy having stuff stuck in my mouth for long periods of time. I keep running my tongue over the strips and it's just so awkward. And the inside of my lip feels really weird. But I'm going to stick with it. I'll have whiter teeth in no time! Oh and I've started flossing. Not regularly, but I gotta start somewhere, right?

Emotions.

My emotions have gone haywire. It's wearing me down.

This has been a rough weekend/week. I am so stressed out. I have so much to do! And I don't have any time because I keep committing myself to new things! Yes, they're small commitments, but still. Last semester my days were pretty much the same routine. This semester it's crazy. Weird breaks in between classes, I've started tutoring middle schoolers on Tuesday, I'm taking Group Fitness classes, I think I'm going to start going to Antioch's LifeGroups.

I feel like I just don't have time, anymore. I guess I'm going to have to start getting used to going to bed past 11 and getting less than 8 hours of sleep. This semester's tough.

Behind.

I feel really behind in school already. Maybe that's because I missed a day of classes for my grandma's funeral and then we had two snow days in a row. Or maybe it's because my classes are A LOT harder than last semester and I'm just used to breezing through things. Or maybe I studied more last semester and I've been spending more time goofing off and not studying or doing my homework. Whatever it is, I'm behind. And I don't like it. I feel like I can never catch up. Like I'm just drowning in behind-ness. I don't know.

Superbowl

Today was the first Superbowl in ... four years? where I was not at Zachary Horst's house surrounded by people I know. Instead, Jon and I went to our friend Ethan's house. There were maybe ten people there. I knew four or five of them (two of them I've never really talked to before. We're just at Ethan's house so much that I'm around them often). We actually WATCHED the game. Well, I spent most of my time absentmindedly staring at the TV while lost in thought. I actually saw and processed only one touchdown of the game. Everything else I don't really remember seeing.

This was the weirdest superbowl ever.

Shock.

I hate being shocked. I don't mean physically. I mean emotionally. I mean mentally.

I hate finding out that people are changing. I can handle seeing someone change gradually. But it's so hard to handle when it all comes at you at once and you suddenly realize they aren't who they used to be. It's hard to grasp that things will never be the same. It's hard to accept that things are no longer how they once were and it can never go back.

I don't like growing up. I don't like what it brings.

I Love To Dance!

The Band Banquet for the Pride was last Saturday. Unfortunately, the weather caused the banquet to be cancelled. BUT school was cancelled Thursday and Friday! Woohoo!

So I was pretty bummed out that I was missing a chance to get dressed up and pretty and go to a nice event. And then told me the Engineers' Winter Ball is on Friday! That only gave me about five days to decide on a dress to wear. Oh, men, when will you ever learn that girls need AT LEAST two weeks to prepare for a dance/banquet?

So now Jon and I, our best-friends-to-be Ethan and Kaylie (and by best-friends-to-be I mean they will soon be Jon and mine's best friends. They're already dating), and Amy (roommate) and Taylor (her bf) are all going to the Ball! (It took some effort to convince Amy to go. But I'm excited she is!) I didn't really have a nice dress, so I borrowed one of Laney's, but it doesn't fit exactly right. So Amy and I (Amy doesn't have a dress, either) went to Target and Kohl's today to go Valentine's Day shopping, get an application to Kohl's (they aren't hiring. Bummer.) and possibly look at dresses. But as we pull up to Kohls we decide that we really don't feel like trying on any clothes. So we walk into the store and all these cute dresses are staring us in the face. So naturally, I try them on. THEY FIT ME PERFECTLY!!! THAT NEVER HAPPENS! So I bought one. IT'S SO HOTTTT!! I am so excited! I can't wait to dance!

Letters

Today I was reading an article (many of you do not know that I have a guilty pleasure type of obsession with shine.yahoo.com. In my spare time, I read articles about everything there is. It's how I keep up with life.) about a woman who has a child with Tourette's. This woman is actually one of the writers of the weekly love articles (I think), but she started talking about how more often than not, when women have their first child, the husbands get pushed aside. This isn't the point of my story though. She mentioned briefly that she has kept a journal of letters that she wrote to her child before he was born. Just letters about how she's going to love him no matter what he turns out to be and stuff like that. It inspired me.

I really enjoy writing letters to Jon and mailing them to him even though we only live a few minutes away now. I guess that's the hopeless romantic in me. I'm a sucker for old-fashioned things. Anyways, today I decided to write a letter to my future child (IMPORTANT NOTE: I am NOT pregnant. Nor will I be until I'm married. I don't want any drama/confusion/rumors spread haha). It felt really odd, but at the same time, I can just imagine him/her reading it when they're older. Or having his/her father read it to them when they're a few years old. Or if (hopefully not, though) something were to happen to me in child birth and early in their life, I want them to know that I looked forward to being their mom so much. I basically said in the letter that I'm 19 years old right now, and even though starting a family is quite a while away, I want them to know that I think about them a lot and look forward to my future with them and that I'll always love them no matter who they are, where they live, or how old they are (because they'll always be my baby). And I've decided I'm going to this quite a bit. I don't mean write a letter every day, but maybe once a year. And I was very careful not to say anything that could make them think that I was hoping for a girl for my first child (in case it's a boy), or anything about a father (since I don't know who that will be), or anything about how I hope their future will be (ex: I hope we'll be rich so I can give you everything you need and more.) because I don't want it to seem like I couldn't provide for them if the future didn't turn out that way. Mostly I just talked about how I want them to be happy and that's my goal in life. To provide my kids with what they need to be successful and happy to the best of my ability.

I know that might be weird, but I really hope it'll mean a lot to my future kid. I hope it's something they'll treasure forever.